Safer place

I woke up to the sound of something. I'm not sure what, but it's most probably not the rain. I woke up, thanked the Lord that I was still alive, and wondered about the time. I slept at 2 am, by the way. When I went down, I immediately heard the sound of the rain. I thought Falcon was already gone. I mean, we got what we wanted ; suspension. But then again, not everything is about me, what I want, or what blessing was given to me. And I believe this isn't a blessing. Why?

Because last Thursday night, instead of being productive like I promised myself I would be for the whole school year, I was on Facebook, patiently waiting for an announcement of suspension. And there was a moment of hypocrisy too, for someone asked me if I could pray for the suspension, and I said I wouldn't because that would mean the storm would be stronger and more people would be affected. But at around 8 pm, when I have not done a single thing yet, deep inside, I was praying for it too, without even being sorry for not being ready in case there were classes the following day. And there came the announcement at about 9:30 pm, when I was actually thinking of doing the work assigned, even when it meant staying up late. Well, that idea was soon banished from my mind, and I was dancing alone, and thanking God over and over again for the suspension. I still slept late and I can't even remember what I did that night.

Friday came and procrastination followed. I even tweeted about doing schoolwork. But I spent the rest of the day again, doing things I'm not supposed to be doing. And then the news came, the pictures flashed on my screen. Marikina River was overflowing, people are comparing this to Ondoy, relief operations, etc.

That was when it came to my mind. What I said last Thursday night was hypocritical, and I should be saying that to myself. I was wising for something that would only be good for me. Everyone else was devastated. The whole country was affected. I'm not really saying that the whole Falcon thing was my fault, but I just wished I could've been more sensitive.

So now, I'll be doing homework on a Saturday. It's not a punishment for myself, but I thought of a way to return things to their righteous order, and maybe this is it. Wish me luck, and may the guilt be erased from my mind by doing this. I'm really sorry, and I'll be setting out on my way to prove I have learned from a terrible mistake.