Last Tuesday, during Recess time, I was told by Miss to come to her office during SSP, and I didn't really know what to feel about it. I tried to hide my surprise and I was so thankful that she was only there for a couple of seconds, because I mouthed a big "WHY?" after she spoke to me. I thought it was somehow related to English or section matters since our Recollection is fast approaching, but I didn't really think of it much because my Filipino Monologo was coming in a few hours. I was so stressed. I love acting, but being unprepared makes everything else seem irrelevant. But God proved his goodness once again when he guided me all throughout the subject and I managed to get all the words out, even if most of them are ad-libbed. After that very nerve-racking performance, I went on with life. How unpredictable life is. So I went to the CA's office and saw that I wasn't the only one called. There were four of us, and the familiar smile and hug of a close friend makes all the tightening in my chest a bit lighter. Okay, let's cross out the section matters. Miss approached us with the happiest look on our face and told us everything. Oratorical. Essay. It still needed time to sink in. I know a little about it because my former busmate had participated in one, but hers was in Filipino. But Miss said that she still needed to choose from us. Now that's where it struck me. Competition. I can't do this. I can't. That was my disposition from there. I know these people. Really amazing writers, good speakers, and where am I in all those? I hated competition. And I never believed in myself before. I could never trust myself with a challenge that concerns me versus other people. We were given some kind of a test, wherein we needed to come up with something and send it to Miss before 9pm.
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